Wednesday, 3 February 2010

Discussion Point – Comments – You do Know That It’s a Two Way Street?

A few weeks ago while trawling the net I came across a few post about comments on blog post. The articles were more in the vein of why don't people comment more or better ways to encourage comments on your blog…
While these were all tactfully done and generated quite a few valid reason why people don't comment or don't comment more there was one thing missing and at the time I was reading those articles I didn’t even realize it…

It took a conversation with my son to make me see that this one thing is becoming more and more rampant over the blogosphere.

As a parent  I bow low to all the parents who take time out to sit and have the everyday discussion with their kids or drop everything and give there child their undivided attention. As my kids get older I am not ashamed to say I blank my kids as and when I have to and as often as I can get away with it…

Seriously I do – there is only so much of them that I can take….

My son has come up with a schedule of how our discussion works – he tells me what’s on his mind, school, toys, the odd girls issues or which piece of electronics he is going to destroy next . Then depending on the urgency of the topic I respond in kind.

But I always get back to him – The electronics normally gets an immediate answer….

But at the core of it, is that I always answer him…..

Not so in blog world however.. I am seeing more and more blog where comments are happening but blog owners don't respond or choose to respond to isolated comments.

I am not picking on any one or two or even 10 bloggers – but as bloggers we put it all out there for visitors to come by and chat. We have a pretty decent post up, we enable the comment field on the post and to top it off there are countless little avatars around asking us to "comment" or "comment feeds our blog".

I for one love comment – I would be a cross eyed bitch if I said I didn’t and I do respond to 99.5% of all comments on my blog. My blog is a tiny little thing and don't take a rocket scientist to manage – but then so is the average blog and more and more it is the average blog that I am seeing this happening on.

Obviously there are exception to this rule – Like the site or blog owner who reply off post where it can’t be seen( I have tested a few - and some bloggers are brilliant at this).

I hummed and awwwmmed  about writing this discussion post today as I thought “it’s a bloggers choice how they run their blog” – but guess what it does affects me, because you want me to comment – I have - Answer me, Dammit!!.. 

For those of us who have massive Google reader list or whichever feeder list you use and I am one at this point – it sometimes come down to the point where it is no longer worth it to make some of these blogs one of my port of call in my busy day. I am at the phase where I earmark some blogs for a certain day to visit and some blogs I never get to more than once a month….

I will mention Lily from I Love Books here – because not only do I respect Lily viewpoint but I visit literally once or twice a month and then I spam comment on her blog. But guest what even if the post is a month old – she takes the time to respond to each and every comment I leave.

There are obviously blogs that generate hundreds of comments and  some bloggers manage to get involved and while not answering every comment you can feel their presence in the discussion happening on the comments…

Is this only me that is seeing this, or am I just being a moaner – because I hope I am not as I have stopped 
 commenting on some blogs because of this…

Not only is our opinion (all of our opinion) important in blogland but taking the time to built blogland is also important and a big part of this is done through comment…

Some of the funnest people I know now I met through comments… Some of the most intense, in depth and frivolous discussion that i have had I have had it on comments...

What's your thoughts on this…. Am I the only one see this.

66 Speak To Me:

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 16:49 said...

This is an interesting topic for me, because I SUCK at responding to comments IN my comments. It's partly because until the last 6-8 months, most of my blogging has been in knitbloglandia, where email responses to comments are the norm.

Things are a bit different in bookbloglandia and I know I'm only slowly adapting to it. Biggest problem? I don't remember to go comment in my comments...

Patti on 3 February 2010 at 17:52 said...

This is a good topic. I'm bad about replying, although I do try...For the most part I assume people comment and then move on to the next thing and don't check back, but maybe they do and I'm just not realizing it.

When you said "two-way" street, I figured it was going to be a I commented on your blog, why don't you ever comment at my place; but what you've written is good food for thought. Thanks!

Smokinhotbooks on 3 February 2010 at 18:11 said...

In the beginning I was a bit slow to get back to commenters, usually by the end of the day. I work full time (damn day job) and can't always get back to people right away, which I hate.

I do see your point. I don't like when blogs have the comment moderation on. I can understand it, but I don't like it. I remembered how I used to comment on a paranormal romance book blog and the author never got back to me. I stopped commenting b/c what was the point? My questions always went unanswered and I gave up after awhile.

Hagelrat on 3 February 2010 at 18:38 said...

I try to respond on my own blog to everyone, but occasionally miss some. My blogger isn't set up to tell me if I get a new comment on an old post, but if I could work out how that's done that would be great. Anyway, I often comment on other people's but can't always keep track of where I commented to check back.
I knew a guy once who had a great blog (sadly closed due to extensive plagiarism, not a book blogger)who used to get 200+comments every day and responded to every single one, no matter how inane or vague or annoying. I told him repeatedly he was my blogging hero.

wren boudreau on 3 February 2010 at 18:40 said...

This was an interesting post. I think we all have a need to be heard, and when we comment on a post and nobody reacts, it is the virtual version of being totally ignored. Why bother commenting at all?

My problem is deciding how - or if - I wait for a response. I can keep checking the blog, knowing that the blogger may not be back till whenever. Or I can select the option to have follow up comments sent to my email or reader, which means I may get a bunch of them and do I want that. Sometimes I just let it go and hope I remember to go look the next day...

I thought Chris's form of response was kind of weird at first, but then I realized that a) she always responds and b) her response is going to show up in my email, no matter when she gets to it. It's not a bad way to go about it, but then her blog readers don't get to share in all her witty repartee.

Well, I guess the point is I agree with you EH, a response really is rather important, no matter how it's managed. Sorry I blathered so long!

Dana on 3 February 2010 at 19:02 said...

I don't have tons of comments to keep track of, but early on I realized that I had to have email notifications set up- I just wasn't go to remember to check every day for new ones. I want to think that responding to a commenter makes them feel welcome and more liable to stick around; I know it makes a difference in my mind when I see that a blogger has taken the time to respond to me personally.

pattepoilue on 3 February 2010 at 19:14 said...

That's a very interesting post!
There are two kind of blogs i visit, the blogs where i KNOW i'll probably never get an answer (but i still come back at least a day later to check if there's an answer, yes i'm hopeful), and the blogs where i know i WILL have an answer (then i'm checking until i have an answer lol).
This is what usually make my computer crash, i have all these blogs opened and i check regularly if the blogger answered me back. (and when my computer DOES crash i have a hard time remembering where i need to check!)

Anyway, i do comment back every time someone comments on my blog,even if it's only to say thank you or even aknowledge that i've read their comments.
My blog is very small it's not a big deal to answer but i understand it could be more difficult for bigger blogs. And most of all i love to have conversations with people. Sometimes it's sad to think that when i comment back the commenter will probably never come check out the answer. But sometimes i have people coming back and a conversation takes place. I LOVE that. I wondered if people thought i was stalking them since i always take the time to answer as soon as i can.
Great and interesting post =)
Have a great week

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 19:20 said...

@Chris...

Chris - I actually think you are great on comments. You and the cats are fun.. I will admit it took me a while to get to the direct response approach, but I have and I sort of expect it when I leave a comment...

Because I know you always respond...

And the key here is that you do - not how you do it...

There is one other blogger that does that to me as well and she is great as responding as well... no matter how late...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 19:26 said...

@Partti..

For the most part I assume people comment and then move on to the next thing and don't check back,

Nope - If I comemnt on a blog, I have choosen to do so - because something there attracted me to the post or just in support of a blog...

And expecially for blogs that do not have the follow by email option, I always try to circle back at some point...


I figured it was going to be a I commented on your blog, why don't you ever comment at my place


I know bloggers who have hint at this - for me it is not neccessary - if a post is not for you dont force yourself....

The fact you know where I am is enough...

E.H>

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 19:27 said...

I have to admit that I love WordPress blogs that have the subscribe to comments. And Blogger has that, too. Haven't seen the option for TypePad, alas. I really do enjoy the conversations that start on some blogs in the comments, particularly Tam's, Kris', Wren's, Jen's... Ok, I'll stop now.

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 19:31 said...

@KC..

In the beginning I was a bit slow to get back to commenters, usually by the end of the day.

I never worry about stuff like that - as not all of us are fortunate enough to be chained to the pc 24hrs ...

As long as some response is done - I am sure commenters feel welcomed...

I stopped commenting b/c what was the point? My questions always went unanswered and I gave up after awhile.

Recently I made that decision to stop going to a few blogs - because there is just not a feel like I am valued there... So I agree with your statement ... and it was not a sudden decision for me..

E.H>

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 19:34 said...

Aw, thank you, EH! I do love the email conversations that start (as well as the comment conversations) - I have some great friends as a result of those intermittent and yet extended conversations.

wren boudreau on 3 February 2010 at 19:35 said...

*waves at Chris*

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 19:36 said...

*waves back at Wren*

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 19:38 said...

@Chris...

I love those blogs - But on the other hand Tam's, Kris', Wren' blogs are built to operate like that and I respect them all for jumping in there and moving the conversational along... they are really goos at that.

I couldn't do that because there is ony so much tease and innuendo that I can carry on with for any length of time....

But chipping in every now and again - I love that...

Jen is brill' - another blogger that answers every comment and gives really good suggestions as
well...

As for your blog - you do know we only come over there to visit your cats and view your made photostock Skillz... I hope you know this.....

So steak for dinner for the devil and the panther princess...LOL

E.H>

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 19:47 said...

Heh. I owe my success to Chaos and Mayhem and FxFoto and Picasa, huh? ;)

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 19:52 said...

@Hagel rat..

I often comment on other people's but can't always keep track of where I commented to check back.

This is one of the thing I hate about blogs that dont have the follow by email option available...

That makes it so much easier...

That blog you directed me to the other day - He gets loads of comments, but if you look thorugh you do see him there getting involved and taking the piss as well...

I'll email you about the past post comments...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 19:54 said...

@Chris...

I thought you knew this.... Chaos and Mayhem are my heroes....

and slouching guy... and candy cane guy...

E.H>

Hagelrat on 3 February 2010 at 20:01 said...

Cool, you rock. :)

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 20:08 said...

*scuffs toe in virtual dirt and blushes*

Aw. :)

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 20:25 said...

@Wren...

when we comment on a post and nobody reacts, it is the virtual version of being totally ignored. Why bother commenting at all?

Why do you sound like you have been talknig to my son - That's exactly how he would phrase that - and I agree with you..

My problem is deciding how..

I think you have summed up the matter as suitable for you - I also have the odd blogs that I just hit and miss with comments,

Just to say I was here - but then there are blogs more than less that I would like to see not only a response to my comment, but what will develop in the background..

Most time this the funnest part and depending on the tone of the post where the meat of the matter is carved out...

It's not a bad way to go about it, but then her blog readers don't get to share in all her witty repartee.


I think I have just about gotten used to Chris and her repsonse and other commenters are definately missing out on the funnier side of Chris' personnality and they dont get the chance to see when the kitties come to visit...


Blabber all you want - As an author I love seeing you guys get involved and keep abreast of what is happening in and around blogland...

E.H>

I

wren boudreau on 3 February 2010 at 20:51 said...

EH, is your son a teenager? Because sometimes I think I got stuck in my psychological development at the mid-teen years. *g*

I agree with you that the energy really does amp up when the conversations start to take on a life of their own - sometimes in a serious way, othertimes just in fun.

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 21:01 said...

@Wren ..

Yup Teenager going on sixty... All attitude and know it all...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 21:04 said...

@Dana..

I know it makes a difference in my mind when I see that a blogger has taken the time to respond to me personally.

I agree - I remember my first visit - we had a nice chat - very welcoming...

Thank you...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 3 February 2010 at 21:17 said...

@pattepoilue

(but i still come back at least a day later to check if there's an answer, yes i'm hopeful)

I was also at that phase and then I thought life is too short for this sort of thing... And I stopped visiting..

, i do comment back every time someone comments on my blog,even if it's only to say thank you or even aknowledge that i've read their comments.

That is all I can or any commenter can ask for... recognise that we took the time to comment..

I love the conversation as well - I most time find out more from there than the actual post itself...


Sometimes it's sad to think that when i comment back the commenter will probably never come check out the answer.


You might be surprise at how much actually do come back...

E.H>

Tam on 3 February 2010 at 21:19 said...

I always respond, but then again only about 6 people regularly show up there so no biggie. I suppose when there is 190 comments it's nearly impossible. But even when I post at Wave's and get 40 responses I respond to each one, or try to anyway. I get notifications in my e-mail when anyone responds on my posts.

I do enjoy it when I get a response but I also learn which bloggers do and which don't and don't take it personally when I don't get a response from some. But when I first started blogging I seemed to see the etiquette of responding to each post (even if in a bulk response later) and I picked that up.

I also think it's fine to have commenters chat to each other in the comment thread. I'm good with that, it's a social space, talk amongst yourselves, but if you say "Oh I loved that book too." I want to acknowledge that I heard you and I appreciate you taking the time to share something with me. Most blogs I go to resply, those that don't I either move on if I think they're ignoring me or if that's their style and I know them then I don't worry about it.

Ummm. I'm not begging comments, you don't have to comment at all, but I have a poll at my place today. Go and VOTE who you think is hotter. Fire fighters or law enforcement.

Shawn Lane on 3 February 2010 at 21:52 said...

I think I try to respond to most comments. Sometimes it might be a general one to all the commenters, like, thanks for your comments. Is that bad? Or if it's eye candy I feel a bit silly saying, yes, you are right he is gorgeous, constantly.

But you did make me go back and respond to your request for a certain picture today with your post about comments, lol.

Jude Mason on 3 February 2010 at 22:23 said...

Might as well dive in here!

I wish I had the traffic you do here, E.H., LOL! I have my blog set so all the comments go to my email box. I reply to people there, unless it's a one or two word comment, ie: Nice blog, or Great post. I really don't know what to say to that besides, Thanks, and that seems kind of dumb to send.

When I first had my blog, I rarely replied to comments, thinking as others have said here that those people who did comment were long gone and didn't come to see if their comment got a reply. I also thought that maybe people would get tired of see all my responses.

This is a great topic!!

Hugs

Helen Hardt on 3 February 2010 at 22:24 said...

I don't always respond to commenters on my blog. My feeling is they probably won't come back to read the comments, lol. But I do try to visit their blogs and comment. I think that's more appreciated, but I could be wrong ;).

Kris on 3 February 2010 at 22:59 said...

I have my blog set up so that the comments are sent to my email. Sometimes that can be a little overwhelming when I wake up of a morning *lol*, but I personally think it's important to respond to all comments and I want to make sure that I don't miss a single one of 'em. For me, it's just a matter of simple courtesy.

Having said that, I do understand that people are busy and may not have the time. I'm still disappointed though when I don;t get a response.

Chris on 3 February 2010 at 23:12 said...

Especially since Kris posts topics that generate a lot of chatter, and she posts them in the peak of Europe/North American awake time, while she's asleep.

wren boudreau on 3 February 2010 at 23:29 said...

Yeah, Kris is magic like that!

Eyre on 4 February 2010 at 02:45 said...

Great post, E.H. My blog is just my little personal journal, but I figure that if someone took the time to comment, then I should take the time to reply. I know that when I comment on a blog, I always subscribe to the comments because I want to see what other people have to say about the topic. I do, however, understand how that could get overwhelming for people who have popular blogs that generate lots of comments.

Lily on 4 February 2010 at 04:08 said...

Great topic, EH :)

As you already said in your post, I always respond to comments on my blog. I've got it set up to send me an email notification and although it might take me a few hours to respond I will do it. Darn that EDJ for getting in the way of responding right away.

I just think if you're going to post something and have the comments option available you need to respond when people leave a comment. I expect the courtesy of a response when I leave a comment because really why would I want to acknowledge your post by commenting and then never hear from you. At least a blanket comment such as "Thanks for your comments, everyone!" will work for me.

Maybe I'm just a needy person. :D

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:07 said...

@Tam

I always respond,

I would be surprise if you didn't - from how interactive you are at Wave's place - I never expected anything less of how you run your own blog...

I also think it's fine to have commenters chat to each other in the comment thread. I'm good with that, it's a social space, talk amongst yourselves,


You and a few others are really superb at this and it does make my days to stop by...


Most blogs I go to resply, those that don't I either move on if I think they're ignoring me ..

It's just the months visiting before you realize that - Hell this is going nowhere, and you wonder if they realize that they have one less commenter on their blog...


I am coming over to vote - how can I resist...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:14 said...

@Shawn

Sometimes it might be a general one to all the commenters, like, thanks for your comments

Thats all we ask - and I think we give you more problem that you sometimes expect...

We love it...

And I thank you again for going searching for me - I know all the other hussies will benefit - but those are the breaks we take...

As I said - any teapot will do.. LOL

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:23 said...

@Jude...

I wish I had the traffic you do here


Even if you only have one - which you don't, it's nice to show the love with a response.....


I also thought that maybe people would get tired of see all my responses.

I know not everyone can be pleased, but the fact is that at least some acknowledgement is done..

I know I do an individual response to all my comments and that work for me - because that's me and I think I want to show each person that I value the time they took to not only stop by, but to chip into a conversation as well...

Some bloggers bulk comment - -I still dont mind - As long as it works for them..

And I definately check your blog Ms Jude to see what you are up to...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:26 said...

@Helen..

I think that's more appreciated, but I could be wrong ;).

Helen ...we do check back, sometimes we lurk alot, as I do on your blog..

But I love the fun you have on your blog and I always swing by every day...

So you just might be pleasantly surprise at how many people make your blog a daily event... I know I do..

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:32 said...

@Kris..

Sometimes that can be a little overwhelming when I wake up of a morning

I know the feeling - I will admit I am secretly pleased that people actually took the time to comment though...

I do understand that people are busy and may not have the time

Personally I would say remove the comment field off the post... Am I being too harsh...

I agree on the disappointment as well...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:33 said...

@Chris / Wren

Don't you know that Kris is going for world domination - please don't give her any more ideas than she already have...

E.H>

Sassy Brit on 4 February 2010 at 08:41 said...

Okay, this is a slightly mad, and lengthy answer. Please bear with me.

I feel responding is just good manners. Kind of Internet etiquette. (I should have stopped here!)

If a blog is up for visitors, (comments are open) I tend to think they want comments, and have on occasion felt a little offended being ignored. OK once or twice, doesn't matter. Even a late response is better than none and better than being ignored.

Isn't that like inviting people round your house and never opening the door when they turn up? LOL

Lately, because I know how it feels, I even go back and regularly check any older posts with only one comment. So now, readers will rarely see a post where a comment has been ignored.

H O W E V E R Like everyone, there are times when I'm not feeling up to much, life, my day job, illness, -- they can all take their toll. Sometimes I may even miss a comment! (Shame on me!)

I personally try to catch up, most of the time, but I can understand others who can't do this. The trouble is, we can't read minds - especially not through the Internet, so it still feels like the shut door syndrome. All the lights are on but they're hiding behind the settee hoping we'll go away? LOL The "shush-if-we-dont-say-anything-she-wont-know-we-are-here" side of the shut door syndrome. The dark side.

But, we do. A home page/blog is where you live on the Internet. We know where you live! We like visiting. LOL

I used to get really annoyed at this myself, but now I see it as my own choice, I can't control the movements of others (just yet!) but I can stop commenting on a blog where I always feel the door is shut to me...make sense? I haven't been up long :)

Even a "thank you!" means a comment has been seen and a reader's view AND the time they have taken to comment - have been acknowledged. I think that counts for something, don't you?

Great discussion point.

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:51 said...

@Eyre..

My blog is just my little personal journal, but I figure that if someone took the time to comment, then I should take the time to reply.

Need I say anything else after that - Love the time you take to respond to you readers..

Thanks hon..

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 08:55 said...

@Lily

Darn that EDJ for getting in the way of responding right away..

You and me hon - you and me...

"Thanks for your comments, everyone!" will work for me.

That works for me as well too, seems as if alot of blogger dont realise this as well...

Thanks Lily - for being a great sport always..

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 09:15 said...

@Sassy..


I feel responding is just good manners. Kind of Internet etiquette


I think when it come to blog land because it's a faceless entity - manners goes out the window... So Sad.

I used to get really annoyed at this myself, but now I see it as my own choice

It 's another sad issues where just by not doing the courteous thing a blogger will lose readers - who may or may not could have become more than just a reader...


Even a "thank you!" means a comment has been seen and a reader's view AND the time they have taken to comment - have been acknowledged. I think that counts for something, don't you?

Agreed...

E.H>
-

Sassy Brit on 4 February 2010 at 12:01 said...

Thanks EH! :) See, I'm on my best behaviour now. LOL Now, I must get some work done-- ha! Catch you later!

wren boudreau on 4 February 2010 at 13:33 said...

EH - I think you are right about Kris and world domination, although it sounds like Sassy may want in on that :D
This has been a terrific discussion!

Jenna Byrnes on 4 February 2010 at 14:39 said...

Interesting post, EH. I wish I had more time to read all the wonderful blogs out there, but if I want to write, I need to moderate myself. I'm guilty of passing through without leaving comments, but I do like to see what people are up to.

As far as my own blog goes, I don't have a lot of comments but do like to acknowledge them individually.

Have a great day!

Rebecca J Vickery on 4 February 2010 at 16:45 said...

HI EH,
Great topic as evidenced by all the comments. I am very guilty of being LATE responding to comments at my blogs, but since I love to gab I do try to respond. Even if it's only a "thanks for dropping by" or something similar. I too like to have a response when I leave a comment just like I want someone to at least grunt when I speak to them. LOL (Talking husbands and teens, here)

pattepoilue on 4 February 2010 at 17:36 said...

'You might be surprise at how much actually do come back'

;) I sure hope so.

And you're right often enough the good part is happening in the comments =)

Have a great end of the week

Fiction Vixen on 4 February 2010 at 17:37 said...

Great topic EH. While I love it when a blogger responds to my comments I'm not put off if they don't. I'll still return and comment if the blog content interests me. If I ask a specific question, I do appreciate an answer. I also enjoy responding to comments on my blog.

Val on 4 February 2010 at 19:40 said...

Hi, E.H., I'm coming late to the discussion here, but I think you've written a great post. I agree with you that replying to comments is a good thing. I always do that. It takes a lot energy to make a comment in the first place, and it can be a bit of a bummer not to get a response (like Lily was saying, an overall "thanks, everyone" is good enough, or a simple "thanks" to each comment). Plus sometimes blogs can generate a clique-ish vibe where all the regular visitors are going off-topic and batting around their in-jokes and a newcomer has no idea what's going on. Then if she makes a comment and doesn't get it acknowledged with a response, she can feel as if she doesn't fit in. The visitors may not acknowledge her but the blog owner can play "good hostess" and do so. It's a small thing to do and goes a long way.

Kris on 4 February 2010 at 23:07 said...

Don't you know that Kris is going for world domination - please don't give her any more ideas than she already have...

Darn. *Note to self: Must be less obvious.*

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 23:10 said...

@Kris....

Darn. *Note to self: Must be less obvious.*

As if you could.....

We can only arm ourself for full frontal assault...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 23:13 said...

@Wren...

I know I am right about kris... I can see her taking baby steps to superpowerdom....

Thank you....

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 23:18 said...

@Jenna...

As far as my own blog goes, I don't have a lot of comments but do like to acknowledge them individually

I know you do hon... even if it's me.. I am always assured an answer.

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 23:26 said...

@Rebecca..
I am very guilty of being LATE responding to comments at my blogs, but since I love to gab I do try to respond

I think you are great at comment - there is always a vibes going on...

good on you girl...


just like I want someone to at least grunt when I speak to them


too true....

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 23:30 said...

@FV...

Hey Ms Vixen.....

If I ask a specific question, I do appreciate an answe

me and you - As I always have a question - whats the point of blogging if you are not going to chat...

E.H>

Erotic Horizon on 4 February 2010 at 23:35 said...

@Val..

Thank you..

Plus sometimes blogs can generate a clique-ish vibe where all the regular visitors are going off-topic and batting around their in-jokes and a newcomer has no idea what's going on.

I didn't even want to mention that - but I agree, I sometimes try to be the bigger person and still comment, but the in-jokes sometimes make the whole blog have a "My Club" sort of feel to it...

Valid points Val - thanks

E.H>

ErotRomReader (Janna) on 5 February 2010 at 00:09 said...

Great topic! As a new kid on the block a few months ago I had no clue and just copied other bloggers' behavior and customs in responding to comments. That's how I ended up responding to every single commenter on my own blog. I like that a lot: it's not only fun to know that people have read your post but also to have a laugh or exchange some recs.
As a commenter on other blogs I find myself being attracted more to blogs were the blog host is welcoming and responding to my comments (whether it is by email or the comment section). That way you start to feel connected to someone, you can discover more of your shared interests or feel safe enough to get more personal on certain topics.
I always use email alert if the blog has that feature and I'm using that for my own blog as well. But sometimes it can take a while for me to get back to commenters because of other distractions (like the edj) or the different time zones. Often I want to respond to a response on my comment as well, and sometimes the same distractions get in the way of that too...

Donna [F.D. Ramblings] on 5 February 2010 at 04:22 said...

I'm glad you posted about this topic. I've been thinking along the same lines as you. You nailed it! I think you, Chris and several others out in blogland do a super job at commenting. I try to comment back to everyone when possible. Sometimes it's not till late at night because I caught up in my day job or some family function after work, etc. While I do comment back on my blog, I find sometimes it's hard to find different ways to respond to very a lot general comments left on the blog. LOL! I've said it before, I'm not a word smith. ;)

When I comment around the blogs I always look for the follow comment button or the rss comment feed for that post. But I noticed a lot people don't follow comments where they comment because I'll ask a question of the commentator and not get a response back. That's okay though, I don't expect everyone to follow the comments.

I'm like you if I comment on blog a lot and they hardly ever respond back. I usually stop commenting too. I feel like my comments aren't necessary there.

Thanks for posting on this topic, someone needed to say it. :)

Erotic Horizon on 6 February 2010 at 09:57 said...

@Janna..

. I like that a lot: it's not only fun to know that people have read your post but also to have a laugh or exchange some recs.

that is most certainly one of the better aspect of blogging...


Often I want to respond to a response on my comment as well, and sometimes the same distractions get in the way of that too...


I know the feeling - I sometime leave my response until I have done the blog rounds and those take forever to get done....

Happy weekend hon...

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Erotic Horizon on 6 February 2010 at 10:15 said...

@Donna

I find sometimes it's hard to find different ways to respond to very a lot general comments left on the blog. LOL! I've said it before, I'm not a word smith. ;)

I sometime find jsut Thank you does it for me... And you are great at that, I think we all jsut want some acknowledgement as wren said...


I'm like you if I comment on blog a lot and they hardly ever respond back. I usually stop commenting too. I feel like my comments aren't necessary there.


I am actually surprise at the response to this - as I think people just sort of thought - it's their blog, let them run it how they want"...

Glad to know - courtesy is still appreciated...

Thanks always for making me one of your stops in the evenings....

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Amy J - Book Addict on 7 February 2010 at 18:10 said...

I will say it now, I am soooo sorry if I don't comment back! (hangs head in shame!)
I have a small window of blogging of only a couple hours a day, and thats only if I don't have errands to do!) but I read each and every comment I receive. I at times respond, but sometimes life gets in the way. One thing that has discouraged me from commenting alot is when I have only a certain amount of time to surf and comment I get really frustrated with those darn word verifications! Now I know why people use them, but when people are short on time it kind of turns them off from commenting. I am setting a new resolution to comment more, but in spurts instead of continuously. Does that make sense?
I do check out all of my blog roll though and I do love seeing what other people are reading. I may lurk, but I am there!

Erotic Horizon on 7 February 2010 at 18:40 said...

@Amy J...

Good evening my dear....

I at times respond, but sometimes life gets in the way.

I know we all face the same challenge - but then this is where prioritising what needs to be done - I know I visit a few blogs less in order to sort out comments...


Even if's a thank you for stopping by - it does make a difference....


I do check out all of my blog roll though and I do love seeing what other people are reading.


You are a braver woman than me - Honesty... LOL

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Brandy W on 8 February 2010 at 18:08 said...

Did you see how many comments you had on here? Very cool.

I try my best to comment back. I won't say I'm always great about it but I do try. My blog has a low comment number so for me is really should be easy.

Also a lot of times I don't comment because i can't think of something to say. Usually someone has already said what I was thinking and writing ditto just doesn't cut it.

Erotic Horizon on 9 February 2010 at 16:06 said...

@Brandy..

I try my best to comment back. I won't say I'm always great about it but I do try. My blog has a low comment number so for me is really should be easy.

I know what you mean - but you have a great way of just bumping me off post, so thats cool as well...

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